Hope

Posted: March 30th, 2009 | Author: Lisa | Filed under: Uncategorized | No Comments »

hiding2

At times I still can’t believe this is real. And then I look down.

If you had told me a year ago that I’d be pregnant today, I would have called you crazy. One year ago, I was recovering from surgery that diagnosed my stage 4 endometriosis. For over a year, I went through a string of pessimistic, unhelpful infertility doctors who gave me anything but hope. All they gave me was the runaround. I wanted a baby so badly, I made it my full time job and mission to make it happen. And eventually it did happen. I persevered and went on to find the most wonderful doctor and clinic in the universe. I didn’t give up hope.

It just goes to show that if you really want something badly enough, and if it is humanly possible, you can achieve it. It could take you longer than it might for other people to get there, but your journey is your journey. Yes, you will resent the people who seemingly get whatever they want at the blink of an eye. But sometimes, if you have to struggle to get that thing you really really desire, you might even learn something about yourself. I sure did.


Objects and Stuff

Posted: March 27th, 2009 | Author: Lisa | Filed under: Uncategorized | No Comments »

velveteen rabbit

Dear Ziggy (or Zoey!),

We’re going to find out if you are a Ziggy or a Zoey soon so I am trying to incorporate “she” and “Zoey” into the sentences when I talk about you. Zoey means ‘life’. I really like that.

I want to talk to you about stuff today. Actual stuff. You’re going to end up with a lot of it in your life. This book is the first thing I ever purchased for you. I’ve been pretty hesitant to buy you very much because it took me a long time to believe that you were actually real and it took me even longer to believe I’d get to bring you home someday. When we find out what you’re sporting between those long legs of yours in 2 weeks then I’ll be able to buy you even more stuff! Don’t worry, it won’t be a purple and pink explosion if you are a girl. And it won’t be a blue and red explosion if you are a boy. Mama wouldn’t do that to you.

Today was pretty exciting because someone else sent you stuff! Imagine! Someone else believes that you are going to be a reality! This is encouraging to me.

I’ve been scattering objects around the house that remind me of you, or that are specifically for you, in order to prepare for your arrival. I am finding myself wishing that everything was already here and set up for you but it’s a little too early for that. But I did start your registry this week. Now that was an amazing feeling.

Soon, our apartment will be taken over with your stuff. I look forward to this time. You are already going to own my heart. I might as well give you my entire home too.

Love,
Mama


Bellybutton

Posted: March 23rd, 2009 | Author: Lisa | Filed under: Uncategorized | No Comments »

Z,

I think you should know that very interesting things are happening to my bellybutton.

bellybutton

It seems to be flattening out on one side, and I am sure that eventually it will disappear completely. I feel you more and more each day. It’s like you’re doing somersaults in there and is reminiscent of butterflies popping popcorn in a field of bubbles. I attempted to draw a picture of said butterflies popping popcorn in a field of bubbles but your mama isn’t a very good artist. Oh well.

Being able to feel you move reassures me that everything is okay. You’re growing!!! This week, your cartilage is turning into bone. I am still amazed that all of this is happening inside of me and I feel lucky that I get to experience it! I can’t wait for the next development.

Your daddy is very excited when I tell him I can feel you move. He has taken to putting his mouth up to my belly and talking to you. It’s pretty adorable.

Until next time,
Mama


Missing Piece

Posted: March 19th, 2009 | Author: Lisa | Filed under: Uncategorized | No Comments »

missing-piece

Baby Z,

I want to be the best mom I can be. I know I won’t be perfect but I’m going to try my darndest not to ever let you down. This is the hardest job I’ll ever have and it’s the only one I’ve ever really wanted.

I love you.


Cards

Posted: March 17th, 2009 | Author: Lisa | Filed under: Uncategorized | No Comments »

cards

Everybody can’t wait to meet you. You are going to have so much love.


Sonogram Review

Posted: March 11th, 2009 | Author: Lisa | Filed under: Uncategorized | No Comments »

sonogram-review

Dear Ziggy,

How much do I love you? I love you so much I can’t think of anyone or anything else.
You are my reason for waking up in the morning, and for going to bed at night. The foods I eat, they are for you. The air I breathe, it is for you. I would do anything for you already.

Love,
Mama


Fit Belly

Posted: March 8th, 2009 | Author: Lisa | Filed under: Uncategorized | No Comments »

fit-belly-9mos

I broke down and went to the maternity store. Yes, Destination Maternity: the maternity superstore. I started showing very early and grew out of my pants by the 6th or 7th week of pregnancy. But I don’t mind, I love how comfortable maternity pants are and am going to have a very hard time going back to regular pants after this is all said and done.

In this photo, I am trying on the 9 month fit belly under a dress to make sure it will fit when I get really, really huge. I can’t wait to get really, really huge.


To Do List

Posted: March 4th, 2009 | Author: Lisa | Filed under: Uncategorized | No Comments »

to-do-list-baby

I love lists - I make them all the time. Here is one for baby preparations. I’m sure I will add to it, a million times over. Especially when the nesting urge strikes.


Old Meds

Posted: March 2nd, 2009 | Author: Lisa | Filed under: Uncategorized | No Comments »

old-meds

These are the leftover drugs from making a baby. We were lucky enough to have the chance to do low-stimulation IVF. If we had done regular IVF, this bin would be much much larger.


Baby Toiletries

Posted: March 1st, 2009 | Author: Lisa | Filed under: Uncategorized | No Comments »

baby toiletries

No other babies have come before baby Z, but for some reason I already own all of these products and somehow acquired them through the years. I’ve read up and now know that Johnson’s products aren’t the safest so most of these will not be used on the little person.